Here For You
by ShortGirlWithAPen
Summary: Sirius doesn't like storms and Remus wants to know why. Set in OotP. Rated to be safe.


**Disclaimer- I don't own Harry Potter or any of its characters!**

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Sirius seemed so different than how he used to be, especially at 12 Grimmauld Place. There were certain people in the Order- one of them being Remus- that could see the bits and pieces of the old Sirius there, the one that they had went to Hogwarts with, that they fought with when the Order started in the first Wizarding War. Still, seeing these things didn't change things being different with him, but then again, twelve years in Azkaban was sure to change someone. It was just unbelievable what it had done to Sirius, making his once lively eyes become haunted and the face of the person who had always seemed to be joking around become serious- though the pun wasn't intended.

Day after day, meeting after meeting, there was always someone who was trying to get something happy out of Sirius. Some days worked more than others, but the stormy days were always the worst for whomever was trying- not that anyone had figured that out of course. Sirius would pull away from everyone to hide out somewhere in the house and it was almost as if he didn't really want to be found. Some of them were very willing to figure this out, but the ones who _were_ willing knew that they should be careful while doing this, them not knowing how he would react to them asking about it, that he had become almost unpredictable these days.

The next time that Remus found that it was storming, he taps on the door of the room that Sirius had reclaimed from when before he ran away all those years ago. Remus was surprised to be able to hear Sirius's mumbled, "Come in." since it had been thundering pretty loud when he had done so.

When Remus walked into Sirius's room, he could see just how exhausted Sirius was, seeing the dark circles under his eyes, the way he was leaning against the wall to watch out the window, seeing the rain come down. Remus doesn't hesitate to go and stand beside him, not saying a word for the moment, and it was even a while before Sirius says something himself.

"I hate storms." Sirius whispers, still looking out the window. Thunder booms right after Sirius says this, making him flinch slightly. Remus couldn't help but notice this, placing a hand on his arm. "They're dark and gray and they remind me too much of what's inside." Sirius stops there, looking as if he wants to say something else but can't get himself to do so.

"Siri, come on. What exactly is it that's bothering you?" Remus asks quietly, not moving away from Sirius in the slightest. He knew that Sirius was never the quiet type unless there was something really bothering him, but he didn't know which was worse- the silence from him or the fact that one of the few people Remus had left wasn't willing to tell anyone what was wrong.

Sirius was still quiet for a few more moments, watching the rain come down still. The little light that came in through the window accented just how thin he had gotten while he was in Azkaban along with the darkness that came with it, which definitely wasn't good at all. Sirius was always strong and smiling, at least in Remus's mind, not looking like he was about to break at any moment, but everything had to change during those twelve years, didn't it?

"The storms never end. Once one does end, another starts, and I can't get away from it." Sirius tells Remus quietly, still looking away. "Ever since I got out, I couldn't escape it. It was almost like leaving my family all over again and all the doubt has come back." At that moment, Remus couldn't stop himself from pulling Sirius into a hug; Sirius freezes for a moment before returning it, closing his eyes tightly, trying and failing to keep tears from falling from his eyes. "Don't let me be alone, Moony, please. I hate feeling like this."

"Well you're not going to be alone. You've got me and I have you, so neither of us have to worry about this." Remus was quiet for a moment, a hand in Sirius's hair. "For what it's worth, there are three Gryffindors that are most likely willing to be there for you too. You don't have to be afraid to reach out, especially not around me or the others."

"Harry shouldn't want to be around me." Sirius says, pulling away from Remus then and looking down at the ground. "I don't do much good for him, and I'm not someone he can look up to."

"But he still loves you." Remus sighs and looks at Sirius. This wasn't the Sirius he knew, not at all. He had never looked more broken than he did at this moment and Remus wasn't sure that there was anything at all he could do about it. "He loves you so much, I can see it. Okay? Next time he's over here, try to reach out to him, let him know that you're here for him."

"But he loves his friends more than me." Sirius whispers, looking out the window at the rain that was just beginning to ease up, allowing some more light to show, falling over the two of them. "There's not much I can do to let him know that I'm here anymore. Can't even really send letters to him now, can I?"

"Sirius look at me." Remus whispers, carefully tilting Sirius's chin to where their eyes meet. Remus has to make himself remain calm then to where he wouldn't let on to Sirius anything that he felt at all, though he knew that it was a losing battle to do this, no matter how much he hated to see the look in Sirius's eyes. "He thinks the world of you, just like he does of his friends. You're family to him, just like you are to me and I'm sure his friends are to him. Anyway, you gave him the mirror, didn't you? You can contact each other that way whenever you need or want to, okay?"

Sirius nods only slightly at Remus, sighing to himself. "I know.." he whispers, his voice more quiet than Remus had heard of it in a long time. "But he hasn't used it yet and d'you think that he just forgot about me?"

"No, of course he didn't forget about you. He's in his fifth year and is probably just busy, okay? Trying to study or maybe trying to pull some prank on someone. I heard there's some people that needs a prank pulled on them." Remus tells Sirius reassuringly. "But that doesn't mean he just forgot about you, not at all. He isn't the type of person just to forget about people he cares about."

Sirius smiles just a bit at Remus, meeting Remus's eyes. "Yeah, okay. I'll try to keep that in mind." Sirius tells Remus quietly, biting his lip afterward. "Maybe I can get through to him sometime? Maybe soon?"

"I'm sure he'd love that, Padfoot." Remus says, smiling, though it falls from his face a moment later. He sighs softly, mainly to himself. "But can you at least try one thing for me?"

"What would that be?" Sirius whispers, continuing to meet Remus's eyes, having trouble from reaching out to him, to reassure himself that Remus was there and wasn't about to leave him. He keeps himself from doing so, as he didn't think that Remus would want him to do this now.

"Try to take better care of yourself and not pushing us away as much as you have bee recently. You don't know how much that hurts us, Siri, especially me. I miss you so much." Remus whispers quietly.

"Yeah, I'll try, okay? Not gonna promise that it's going to be too good, but I'll try at least." Sirius allows his smile to get just a bit bigger then, and though it wasn't much, Remus still appreciated that it was there, glad that there could still be times to smile even when there was a war coming.

"And that's okay, Sirius. As long as you're trying, that's what really matters." Remus whispers quietly, looking over to see that the sun was just beginning to come out. "Hey, looks like the storm's over."

Sirius nods slightly, taking Remus's hand then and looking out of the window, causing Remus to smile and interlace their fingers. "It is. Can you try to be here for the next one though?" he asks.

"I'll try to be here for you. Whenever you need to talk, I'm here, alright?" Remus whispers and Sirius nods. "I'm here for you no matter what happens."


End file.
